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My Toes Hurt

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My Toes Hurt
The Club

The Club:  is a new club in the location that used to be The Crowbar. I guess they've only been open for about three weeks. Anyway, whoever did the decorating for this place, nice work, fucker! This is one seriously beautiful club. The night is called "Transylvania" (which is about the gayest name for a club night evar), and the inside of the club fits the name perfectly. The theme is basically that you're inside of Transylvanian mansion or something like that. Lots of gold plaster, chandeliers, black candles, that sort of stuff. And at some point during the night, the music gets all eerie and slowly, one by one, these crazy black-light pictures on all of the walls begin to glow. On one side are the windows - you're looking out the windows at this black, glowing, evil, tangled countryside with a gigantic full moon glowing off in the distance. On the other side are the gigantic tittied women servicing the various demons that infest this mansion. I guess. Or just blacklight porn, something like that. Whatever it is, it's pretty cool, despite how cheesy I probably made it sound. It takes talent to airbrush blacklight labia like that. Oh yeah, and there's a hermaphrodite, too. What the fuck?

So the gents and I (Fikul and Thrustin, and Sarah who's not a guy) hung out for a bit and got frickin' drunk (strong drink, beware). Samdanista and Squat kept coming over and doing "when are you going to dance, fucker?" And Crazy Rachel (in her "I'm a naught secretary from the 70's" outfit, growwwwr!, costume) came over and covered my eyes and did the sexy "guess who" bit. Eventually, the guys left so I got my boogie on. And that went on until 3am. With periodic conversations with Mark along the way about using Tesla Coils to alter reality and facilitate time travel. <Discourse>I guess I can sort of see why a gigantic magnetic/electric field might allow for time travel, but it would be something where the amount of time travel would be proportional to the strength of the field with nothing exciting happening until the field strength is on a par with, say, the field strength of a black hole. So I don't think Mark's gonna be going MedievalTimes with his Tesla Coil this week. Unless he alters reality with it and changes the laws of physics.</Discourse>

So it was a pretty groovy night. I'd like it if there was something god damned fun to do in this town that didn't involve frickin' goths, but I guess that would be partying with Scottsdale Plastic People, so I guess I'll take the goths. Although I think the goths are just as image-conscious as the Snottsdale Plastics, just in a different way. Oh well, they're not as coked-out.

Anyway, that's it. I think my baby-blue polyester "I'm the dad from the Brady Bunch" coat I bought yesterday is fucked from rain and sweat, but that's okay. And I feel like someone beat me repeatedly with telephone books, and maybe a rubber hose, but that's okay. But, god damn it, OW, I have dance toes! Time to get the tin snips…



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